While on holiday recently an old North & South magazine caught my eye in my Airbnb. In-depth articles, good journalism. Though this copy was dated 2014, the two feature articles were sadly even more relevant today ten years on. Does Money Make You Mean? and Science for Sale: the Murky Role of Corporate Funding.  Sobering stuff.

Needing some light relief, I flicked through less serious pages. A delightful photo caught my eye of a woman wearing a ‘K A L E University’ sweatshirt. I couldn’t help smiling. I love the humour and I love kale. ‘I want one of those,’ I thought as I dived into the article so enthusiastically I didn’t even glance at the heading.

Having eaten plant-based for fifty-two years, I’m over-familiar with snide articles and loud put-downs about what people who eat plants eat. Decades ago, it was bean sprouts and tofu. This article was slamming kale. I’m not offended, but I’m so over it.

What do people get out of lambasting vegetables, lentils, beans, etc, and laughing at people who enjoy eating them? It reminds me of the old-school playground where one or two kids couldn’t resist teasing my kids as they ate vegetarian snacks and lunches.

But it’s adults who delight in Hate-Kale speech; adults enjoying a not-at-all-threatened main-stream diet. They don’t even have to look at kale if it’s not their thing. Taste it. Decide if you like it or not. But if you don’t, why go on about it? I don’t get it.

Never a judgemental boo

It’s tempting to get back at ‘holier-than-thou’ eaters or people who corner you at a party to lecture you about nutrition. But I’ve come across only a few of them over the years. I don’t want to be like that, and most plant-based eaters I’ve met don’t want to either. We hardly say a judgemental ‘boo’. 

‘Ah!’ you might argue, pointing out that I talk about food big-time in this magazine, and in a petty way, I’m criticising someone for criticising kale. You might ask why the word debate features in the heading. It’s because debates weigh up pros and cons, and I like that. And on a trivial note, I can’t resist a playful title with a musical ring to it. ‘Debate’ rhymes nicely with ‘Hate.’

Back to the ‘Kale Fail’ article, Warfarin was mentioned. Evidently you may need to watch how much kale you eat if you’re on blood thinners because kale is high in Vitamin K. Interesting.

I checked Cleveland Clinic recommendations. Kale wasn’t on their list of high Vit K foods to watch. Instead, there were carrots, celery, corn, cucumbers, lettuce, onions, peppers, potatoes, pumpkin, sweet potatoes, squash, cranberry, grapefruit, and pomegranate. These foods are eaten in abundance in Mediterranean and plant-based diets. I hope I never need to pop blood-thinning pills!

Next, I read that kale is loaded with oxalates. But I recall noting a while ago that, according to USDA data, a 100-gram serving of kale contains around 20 milligrams. The same amount of spinach has a whopping 970 mls. Oxalic acid tastes bitter. That’s why kale tastes better in smoothies than spinach and silver beet.

Around 70% of the magazine article was about hating how kale tasted.

A matter of taste

‘Food is always a matter of taste,’ it says. Fair enough, though I could debate that. But who can debate taste itself? Some people hate kale. Some love it. So what?

I finally noticed the article’s category heading: Review/Social Studies Ah. It’s about people! Maybe even philosophy, as near the end, a deep question is posed, ‘What is the meaning of kale?’ Gosh! I read on enthusiastically. Now we’re digging deep.

Another sigh. How many more ways can someone say they don’t like this inedible weed and, by implication, the trendy, Gwyneth Paltrow-type people who eat it? With kale in my morning smoothie, lunchtime salad, and gracing my dinner plate, I know I don’t fit in a mainstream food world. But like many plant-food lovers, I’m definitely not a Gwyneth type.

I suppose I should’ve been steaming mad, but as I read a comment about steaming and seasoning our classic kiwi green, silver beet, I felt inspired. I like silver beet. Not with the suggested ‘knob of butter,’ but with tahini.

Silver beet is reasonably high in oxalates and vitamin K, but it happily competes with kale, green beans, spinach, broccoli, and peas on our menu. Sometimes, I toss them all together in one meal when I’m at home.

I sorely miss greens when I’m travelling. My holiday went well, but I couldn’t wait to get home, grab my scissors and trug, slip into my garden clogs and harvest a bunch of kale and silver beet to serve with lentil and bean patties for dinner.

Plant food bashing

I hope an objective, rational, public kale debate will eventuate. I find it disheartening that plant-food-bashing is still with us. It is rampant online where people vent, attacking each other in war-like fashion. But when glossy, well-funded magazines publish plant-food putdowns, I find myself wondering why. For what purpose?

Emotionally evocative language and sarcasm often appears light-hearted, but it can have a powerful influence on people. While hate-kale-type articles are meant to give mainstream readers a smile, perhaps there is more to it. I’ve not come across similar articles mocking meat and dairy.

Corporates spend huge amounts on promotion and on fighting off competition. To the public, classic campaigns are obvious. But many contemporary campaigns are not. When plant foods are something to laugh at or cast as having toxic content to fear, it benefits the wider animal food industry. I’d love to know if ‘the murky role of corporate funding’ is involved.

There is a blessing at the end of the rainbow chard plot. An abundance of plant-based recipes and articles are appearing now, thanks to Whole Food Living and other online newsletters and websites. Plant-based recipe books sell, and more people are eating this way, discovering delicious, new, tasty dishes with a low carbon footprint. This rekindles hope for our future while gifting us better health.

I choose to write voluntarily for this locally-owned and thoughtful e-zine to add my voice to many others concerned about health, the climate crisis, food justice, the environment and sustainable living. Should I declare such motives if I want to avoid the stress of being ridiculed and accused of virtue-signalling?

No worry. Kale is high in calcium, which helps the body produce melatonin, the relaxing sleep hormone. Vitamin Kale, here I come!